Stew of Life

I am in a stew. A stew of happiness, love, sadness, fear and hopefulness. Happiness for being so in love with someone and for feeling there is actually someone I want to spend the rest of my life with and for seeing him as someone I would be so lucky to have in my life each and every day forever. Sadness for not being near my family and for seeing them only a few times year. Fearful for not winning him over enough to want to move away to NY with me, from California—the place he loves. Still hopeful that he will come and love me in NY, and more importantly love who he is in NY.